I’ve previously written about how ballroom dance became my key to building successful relationships. Although it began as a source of confidence for me, I gradually became aware of just how much it helps create meaningful connections between people.
In fact, ballroom dance partners are often jokingly compared to romantic partners, because excelling at romance can help you in dancing - and vice versa. Even social encounters help prepare you for meeting potential friends and more-than-friends.
Still skeptical? Then I’ll explain.
1. Working towards a common goal.
All successful relationships involve teamwork of some kind, meaning you are working together to get things like love, financial stability, or a trustworthy confidante. A big part of your compatibility is dependent on how well you help meet each others needs.
Likewise, dance is perhaps the only sport where you don’t compete with the person you’re ‘playing’ with. Quite the opposite actually - the better you work together, the better you will look and feel.
2. Compliments are king.
We all have a fragile part of ourselves called the ‘ego’, and it is very sensitive to being poked. A big part of successful relationships is letting the other person know they are appreciated.
Ballroom dancing can be especially traumatic for the ego, because it feels it has something to prove to the opposite sex. But some genuine words of praise can do wonders for helping you and your partner relax. Sprinkle your appreciation liberally.
3. Becoming comfortable with contact.
These days, physical contact even with friends and loved ones can become a rarity, traded in for phone calls and Skype messages. Yet, there is scientific proof that touch is an important part of building trust and familiarity with each other.
By the way, this doesn’t have to be romantic touching either. Even a hug or a warm handshake tells the other person that you are safe and friendly - very important when closing that business deal, or making a new friend.
Ballroom dancing is rare in that it is one of the few activities that requires constant contact with another person. It might feel strange at first, but growing comfortable with contact is a big part of making strong connections, on and off the dance floor.
4. Your body does the talking.
Ever seen a couple walking together and wonder ‘what ever do they see in each other?’ Other people might be so close you’d assume they are romantically involved, and yet they insist the relationship is strictly platonic.
Body language is a big part of what attracts or repels different people. How you hold yourself, how you move and respond to others, conveys a more about who you are than anything coming out of your mouth.
Learning to ballroom dance is a great way to acquire this ‘je ne said quoi' because you become much more aware of what your body is doing. Better, you learn how to convey yourself with confidence, sensuality, and vitality.
5. Be yourself. Everyone else is already taken.
As I mentioned above, we can learn a lot from each other through body language. A key component of successful relationships depends on how authentic that language is - a fluid, relaxed body conveys you have nothing to hide, but a tense, nervous body can look suspicious.
Perhaps the best part of ballroom dancing is that it gives you permission to find that authenticity - what movements feel comfortable to you - in a safe, supportive atmosphere. Everyone’s doing the same thing, right?
It’s for this authentic connection that dance survives, and thrives, even in today’s information age. So why not try a few steps - they'll help you both in the boardroom, and the bar.
About the Author
Ian Crewe has been dancing ballroom for over 16 years, and has a Licentiate in American smooth and rhythm. He currently teaches at the Joy of Dance Centre, Toronto, ON, Canada. Click here to see when he's teaching.